My mind has been whirling for weeks now. A stew of words, thoughts, sentences, paragraphs, a jumbled mess…and I have found it entirely overwhelming that I haven’t been able to just SIT DOWN and type it all out, free-form as I usually do when my mind becomes flooded with thoughts.
My oldest son, started school last week, leaving me three longer days during the week where I could sit (in theory, when my youngest naps) to hunker down and dive into the growth of this business, and it always proves harder than I think, to find the spaces of time to quiet my mind, to get it all out, to focus on the places that need improvement etc. However, the spaces of time to myself simply do not always workout…and I adjust my attitude to be OK with it. However, at the same time that I say this. I find myself conflicted, and a little guilty. Some days, the truth is, that I would like to be able to sit here at my desk for hours, editing, web-site tweaking, designing much needed marketing materials, writing my daily thruth(s), thus enabling you to read it, become moved by it, feel inspired by it. In turn I hope to inspire myself, by the things that I might just type out here and miss myself.
All these words, and thoughts. Feel pertinent. Feel important. Are a part of me, my soul, my person, my heart, my deepest self.
Today, I made time to take care of myself. I went to the doctor, something I had not done in almost 4 years.
In the last year in a half, I have had some health issues that I have not dealt with, but the last two weeks made me really notice that my body is not well. So, FINALLY, I made an appointment and went. I was glad that I did. I have numerous blood work tests to be done, perhaps something will be revealed…give some answers. Perhaps not.
I am just thankful for TODAY, for THIS day, all the moments of THIS day. The very precious moments that I have been so blessed to spend, living, breathing, laughing with my youngest little person. For all the moments yet to come with my oldest, when I pick him up from school. For his smile, for the hug that I will get to give to him, for the blessing of burying my face into the sweet smelling nape of his neck. For this, and all that makes the relationship between my children and I sacred.
I am SO thankful. So thankful.
XO to you all.
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